We were pleased beyond words to see Georgia happy and forging her way in the world. She is a bright, strong,gorgeous girl that has grasped life with both hands and giving it her all. We are immensely proud of her. The Vietnam we saw has changed, a lot. And not for the better, in my opinion. Greed seems to have overtaken charm in too many instances. It's demeaning and tiresome. Their northern neighbours are decimating their country in ways the French and the Americans and Australians could not, even with occupation and raging war. Hanoi this time of year is grey and glum, which is why Georgia is in Ho Chi Minh City, so I would suggest picking a different time of year to visit, if you're thinking of it. If you shop in Hanoi and think you're getting a bargain keep in mind one thing - "You get what you pay for." The world is a small place and it makes no sense to think you can buy something, especially branded goods, there for 20% or 40% or 60% or whatever less than you can here. And you can't.
Hoi An, according to a couple of the locals we spoke to is best visited mid-year. From May to July the crowds thin, as it's considered the low season, and it’s perfect beach weather around Hoi An, with temperatures averaging around the mid-30's Celsius.
There were some genuine stand-outs on the "genuinely friendly and helpful meter" such as the people at Banh Mi 25 in Hanoi and the reception staff at La Residencia in Hoi An but by and large you need to be very weary of anyone that is trying to sell you anything or provide a service. Before you get overly critical of how some Asian drive please consider the driving environment many have grown up with and may have learnt to drive/ride in.
Look at this popular t-shirt design
To most of us westerners it's really funny.
To a Vietnamese road user it's more a statement of fact.
And this clip, which is not mine, shows what is normal for them
To me it looks like everyone looking out for everyone
and knowing that everyone is looking out for you.
It's a place where the sound of a horn is warning signal
and not an invitation for a punch up.
From what I have seen personally and know about other Asian countries it is the same everywhere.
Japan is not part of the Asia I speak of above.
Don't assume that your children or potential travel partner or companion will like the place just because you are interested.
It can be an acquired taste and a lot of fun but it can also be hell on earth if you are adverse to so many things, like noise, like pollution, like crazy road use, like scammers, like standards of hygiene that are different to ours, and so much more.
I suggest you make them very very aware of what the place is like by giving them lots of info, which is easily found and abundant on the interwebz, and making sure they look at it.
Finally if you think you might want to experience Vietnam, go there soon, before the Chinese and Russians take over everything.
We went to Highlands Coffee for a coffee. Utter sacrilege I know.
We came back, packed and headed off to the airport around 10. 300,000 VND got us to the airport in a cute little cab, without fuss.
A final reminder of the flexibility of Vietnamese road users.
The guy on the left is riding into traffic on the wrong side of the road.
Don't knock it. It works!
This time the weather allowed us a slightly better view of the bridge
across the Red River. A very imposing structure that any city would be proud
of.
As we eventually flew out of Hanoi I looked down and thought
“Good-bye
Vietnam. I doubt we’ll ever meet again.”
Hanoi outskirts on a relatively clear April day
A little over 3 hours later we landed in KL. The temperature outside was
34 degrees but thankfully much cooler in the terminal.
As with so many plans I'd made for this holiday the one about going into
KL itself, because of a 7 hour stop-over, had been thwarted by the airline reducing
it to 4 hours. Not long enough to head out of the airport but uncomfortably
long to stay in the terminal. But,stay we did and filled in the time as best we
could.
Finally it was time to board and sure enough I’d managed to book the
wrong seats. I was convinced we'd booked the extra legroom seats ….. Wrong,
again.
We'd flown business class on the way to KL and now we were in cattle
class. Talk about going from prince to pauper!
Rice paper roll(s, as there were two, initially) and Vietnamese coffee
A flat sticky tasteless thing wrapped and steamed in a banana leaf
with a really nice dipping sauce
Creme caramel
The Hoi An Royal, next door to our hotel.
It was much bigger and looked a lot flashier.
It had people from huge coaches staying in it.
We left the hotel in Hoi An with the usual confusion we have become
accustomed to.
This time it was about the pick up time, which I was very clear
should be 12 midday.
At 12:15 I got the girls at reception to call the drivers wife, who
works at A Dong Silk (because the driver speaks no English, as we discovered
when he came to pick up Georgia), who thought I said pick-up at 1pm instead of
“We must be at airport at 1pm.”
Much gets lost in translation in Vietnam and no matter how clear you
think you have been and how many times you have said what you need and how many
times they have said “Yes” things still go wrong.
The driver got to the hotel at 12:25 looking none too pleased. Not
really my problem.
And off we went. It was an adrenaline filled non-stop ride which took 30
minutes and must have broken every road law in existence, anywhere.
The trip to Da Nang Airport normally takes ~45 minutes
and cost us 280,000 VND (~AU$18)
We got to the airport alive and early which both surprised us and made
us happy.
As on our flight from Hanoi to Da Nang we got the “Sir, you have not
paid for check in bags.” To which I responded “Yes we have and this has
happened on our flight here too, so please check.”
What I found really interesting was that in about 2 seconds and with no
keystroke’s she processed our bags at no cost. Mmmmm……
This time we ended up in “cattle class”. Kids
yelling and screaming, parents yelling and screaming even louder to be heard
over their kids and just generally mayhem.
After I yelled at the woman behind Tiz to get her child to stop kicking
the seat constantly, to which she apologised, things settled down and the hour
long flight went by OK.
Once we arrived at Hanoi Airport I saw quite a few shuttles outside and
one of them was a Vietjet Air unit.
We asked several times if they went to Hoan Kiem, the lake by the hotel
we had booked for the night.
We got the same dismissive “Yes. Yes. Hoan Kiem.” every time. I figured
that for ~AU$8 for the three of us it was a good deal. In retrospect – REALLY
SHIT DEAL.
We figured out that the bus took a set route which didn't go anywhere near
Hoan Kiem.
When this was becoming apparent, by following Google Maps, I went and
asked the driver and his assistant the same question as before “ Do you go to
Hoan Kiem?” They both laughed as they responded “ Hahahaha, Hoan Kiem.”
We finally came to a stop here.
After sharing my displeasure, very loudly and clearly, with the lying driver
we set off to find a taxi, in the rain. I felt terrible for Tiz and Emma as
they were the innocent, and now wet, victims of my cock up.
But wait, the story gets worse. We finally find a Mai Linh (notably
reputable amongst a sea of scammers) cab. The window is wound up and the driver
only responds after I tap on his window a few times. He opens his window the
tiniest bit and I say “Hoan Kiem please.”
He takes a long moment to look at the three of us and our luggage then
gives us that now familiar sorry-but-no-way look and waves his hand whilst
saying “No, no.”
Bare in mind that by this stage I am tired, wet and well and truly over the
recalcitrance I had been putting up with and ask, very abruptly “ Why?!”
He winds the window up, leaving just enough of an opening for me to hear
him and says after a way too long pause “I waiting for friend.” In cab
rank?!?!?
This response really is the end of my now depleted patience and he gets the
venting all of my pent up frustrations. Words like liar and bullshit and other
words which I should not use in any circumstance, but did, spew forth in a scream
that has this lying piece of cab driving shit visibly shaken.
After my rant we head off down the road looking for another cab which
was appearing to be more difficult than finding a genuine Versace bag in an Old
Quarter stall. You should be able to imagine what I mean even if you have not
visited this enjoyable part of Hanoi.
Eventually one of the smaller cabs saw us and pulled over. I was really
grateful but given it was one the really small (think smaller than a Suzuki
Swift) I didn't have the same sense of “we can fit everything and all of you into
my cab, no problem” optimism the cheery driver did
But fit we did, even though we all felt like one pound of sardines in some
ounce can.
The driver had no idea where we were going but,made it understood that I
should give him directions.
Yet another time in my life I was extremely grateful for Google Maps and
it’s offline uses.
We set off in horrible Hanoi traffic, made worse by the rain, and
eventually got to the Apricot Hotel.
How we made it was a bloody miracle, given all the windows were fogged
up and we has so much luggage on our laps the driver could not possibly see out
of the cab with any confidence.
The 12 minute / 2.5kms trip that can, and did, take 35 minutes on a rainy Hanoi afternoon.
Yet another display of the way locals rely on fellow road users to want
to avoid collisions as much as they do. This doesn't always work but mainly it
does.
The Apricot Hotel is very swish
and overlooks the Hoan Kiem Lake, which is surrounded by the Old Quarter. It is one of those hotels that meets the minimum requirement of a work friend that has often said "My idea of roughing it is to stay in a hotel that does not provide lotion." No roughing it at the Apricot!
Although we were damp and tired we needed to get out one last time for a drink
and feed.
We walked around the corner to a bar called The Church. It was the place
I'd seen the really nice black and brass Harley the week before. Lots of the
waiters had full sleeve tattoos and quite a few of the patrons reminded me of
some of the “colorful” characters I knew years ago in Osaka.
I didn't bother me, or Tiz, one bit so we sat down for a beer with a
whisky sour chaser and a Mai Tai.
We enjoyed our drinks as much as we enjoyed the procession of tourist
passerby's from all corners of the globe.
As we didn't want to pay New York prices in Hanoi for our drinks and we
were now hungry we headed off to find a local place to eat. We were in the same
area the kids and I had stayed 6 years ago, so it was somewhat familiar. After
discounting any place that served up only fried foods or any place that looked
like if would only add to the bugs that had been giving Tiz hell for the last
week we settled on this place
And this is what we ate.
Tiz's chicken ...... thingy. Very nice and perfect for her still tender tummy.
Samosa's, Viet style. Yum, especially when eaten with the red stuff below
My fish and rice ...... thingy. Also nice.
Gratuitous selfie
Guess who had been riding her bike in the rain?
The streaks of road grime are not as evident in a photo as they are in real life.
She also had a soaked @rse as did most of her bike riding friends.
Wow, riding a bike on a wet Hanoi night looks like fun!
The whole meal and drinks cost us less than the drinks at The Church. Go
figure.
After dinner we had a wander around and did a “blockie” (an Aussie term
for a walk or drive around the block).
As I had offered to buy Angus a North Face gortex jacket we had a bit of
look for what was available. Earlier on I had done quite a bit of looking into
the hearsay on whether these jackets were indeed genuine “overruns” or fakes
that would fall apart in no time. The opinion on the interwebz seemed divided
but slightly weighted toward FAKE.
I must say that the more I looked the more I was agreeing that you don't
get the same article for 20% of the price.
We went back to our swish hotel and went to sleep.
Hello on this 31 degree (feels like 41 degree) day in Hoi An.
You need to watch it to better understand whats ahead.
Above shows the path we took this morning. Below shows what Google Maps Timeline service thinks we did. Even the mighty Google can occasionally produce something so bad it's funny. If you were drunk, blindfolded AND able to move through walls you would still have trouble following this route.
Next come the photos along the way .....
Above are buckets of sea snails cooked in oil garlic and chilli.
They reminded me of the snacks we would buy at Sundays soccer match when I was a kid in Italy, but we did not have chilli in ours back then.
<------------------------------->
........ and below are the pics we took View as we step out onto the road from our hotel
Massive garden field in the middle of Hoi An
The motto for this place is "Life is too shirt"
This is how they get so much done in so short a time when you order clothes. Can you say - sweatshop? One of many displays that make you wonder what they hell they are thinking when they make them.
DJ Jessie Thuỷ Tiên was warming up the crowd as we headed home. She was playing some heavy bass cookie cutter techno, which I liked. Here's youtube clip, with a taste of Run DMC running through it.
I think Valentino must be in town as this is his bike, isn't it? Racy looking electric unit. I like it.
The Aussie family that scooters around Hoi An with toddlers
increases their chance of dying together.
Here we have a prime example of why you hope that natural selection does indeed work.
So, we have two parents riding around, without helmets on themselves or their ~5yr old daughter, and the little boy wearing a lid that was going to increase his chances of being maimed, if anything.
Poor kids. Please note that Hoi An is like big race track, for lots of riders, with other people and riders as obstacles you try to miss.
***********
This is a pic of a DVD and bookshop on Le Loi St.
It's not just any illegal cheap DVD seller and bookshop.
This bookshop ripped me off 6 years ago and did it in such a way that I laugh every time I tell the story or think about it .
Let me tell you about it.
As the kids and I wandered around what was a much quieter Hoi An six years ago.
They had a very good selection of books and DVD's, all wrapped and sealed ready for purchase. There was an autobiography of a guy called Howard Marks - Mr Nice - which I thought would make an interesting read.
I can't remember how much they wanted for it but it was marginally less that I knew it was worth back home so I offered the woman half the asking price. She said no, or words to that affect, which made me happily walk out the door. No love lost.
As the kids and I walked down Le Loi Street I hear "Mister, mister! OK, for you X (whatever it was that had offered her) dong is OK."
"Fine, deal is done." I thought to myself. I hand over X dong and she hands over a plastic bag ...... yes, with a plastic sealed book in it and takes off like she's just missed the start of a MotoGP.
I casually unwrap the covering of the book to reveal on of shittiest photocopies, of anything, I had ever seen. In defence of the quality, it was readable, but only just.
I laughed then, when it happened, as I laugh now.
To this day I wonder why she took off like she did. The shop she came from was only 20 meters back. I could easily have gone back and demanded my money back, and given that the local hate confrontation and displays of anger they capitulate quite easily.
But, the whole occurrence was worth every dong.
I eventually read the book, with a bit of difficulty, and enjoyed it immensely. As there is also a movie made based on the book I thought about asking them if they had a DVD of it available, or maybe not.
***********
As an aside, we overheard one of the locals telling some Aussies that were sitting behind us for breakfast about how much Hoi An, and Vietnam in general, had changed these past few years.
He spoke of how the Chinese had bought much of Hoi An and how busy it had become wth their tourism. That was brutally evident to us.
He told of how the typhoons over the past few years had washed away their beach and now they had to import, at great cost, sand from further down the coast to rebuild the beach for the tourists to ensure their return. Increasing charges to the tourists are the only way they can pay for this importation of sand.
He spoke of the effect that the dams being built, of which two are now operational, upstream of the Mekong are causing droughts so bad the rice fields are dry and already resembling deserts.
The future for this place is dire and not even the resilient and hardy people that inhabit it are optimistic about it.
